I’ll be waiting for you in the bar on the ground floor. When you get to the front desk, just tell them you’re with me (remember, it’s “X”, just in case you confuse me with your countless other Match dates/admirers/fans 🙂 Look forward to seeing you at 6:00pm! It’s a townhouse right next to the construction at “Y”, which is that new apartment complex. – X
I responded: I’ll write it on my hand so I don’t forget. I promise not to blow your cover. ; ) I’m quite confident I’ll be able to find the address but thanks for your help.
His reply: Love your sense of humour. BTW, cell # is 303-555-1212 in case there’s a problem. You can keep your’s a state secret until we meet and you discover that I’m not a weird stalker.
I wasn’t trying to be funny. I was annoyed. Did he think I would fuck up? Get lost? Tell the (I’m certain) gorgeous hostess that I was on a Match.com date? In a flash, I was nervous and my stomach did flip-flops. I remembered that I never had the preliminary phone call that I do with 99% of my Match.com admirers. I find this is an important step – you can learn a lot in a few minutes i.e.. nervousness, stuttering, boring, neurotics, low energy level (think Jeb Bush!), poor education, and lack of mutual interests among other things. Why didn’t I have the mandatory phone call?! Grr….I went back to read his online profile. I immediately saw a few flags I may have missed the first time because I found him handsome, intelligent, and his note so charming:
“Ex-wife and sons live in another country, and ready to get out and enjoy my life again after a few years of emotional hibernation…..The truth is that I’ve always been attracted to self-confident, attractive intelligent women and I’m probably more inclined to go with someone closer to my own age, certainly someone who is closer in age to me than my two sons!. A little further down I saw a few more flags:
There are a lot of exceptional women in this city, as I am beginning to learn. I will say that women over a certain age have the charm and elegance of a great French premier cru wine, and as any wine aficionado can attest, when you’ve sampled a superbly complex older vintage, it’s very hard to go back to younger, less mature stuff.. A Portuguese vinho verde might be temporarily refreshing, but it doesn’t enliven the senses the way a great Cos D’Estournel can do. Even though I’ve made mistakes in previous relationships (we’re all human after all), I remain optimistic that I can eventually get it right with the partner who can help me unpack my considerable baggage :-).
Why does his profile say he’s looking for woman 30-54 and he’s 55. Hmm… 30 doesn’t sound like his age group. If his daughters are in their mid 20s that would make 30 much closer in age to them than to him. A slightly snooty/elitist wine snob who’s coming out of “emotional hibernation with considerable baggage”? Ugh. I wondered what this one has packed away in his designer luggage? Could he simply be talking about his divorce? Something worse? Jail time, perhaps? Another felon? Mental breakdown, maybe? Manic Episode? Depressive episode?
I suddenly wasn’t looking forward to my date… but then again, this is precisely what I do before each date I go on: I try to talk myself out of the guy before I even leave my home! I pray I’m wrong this time.