In Good Company

Kirstie_Alley_1994

Kirstie Alley and I think alike. Although she’s 12 years my senior and has been struggling with weight ups and downs for decades she’s not impressed by her selection of men. Seems she’s met a lot of the same sort of characters that I have!

The 64-year-old actress recently told Entertainment Tonight about her dating dilemma as a woman over 50. “I wanted to say something to men over 45. Don’t be so freaking boring!” Alley said. “Don’t have the life already sucked out of you.” She too would like to do everything in her power to avoid dating much younger men.

Alley announce081415_stone2_450d that she was ready to “hook up,” after her most recent weight loss. Here’s what she said about dating dull men her age,

“All it does is leave women to date young men and be really embarrassed, because we are dating guys in tank tops,” Alley continued.” I want some men around my age that aren’t boring, and act like they are tired.”

Believe it or not, even Sharon Stone, the absolutely gorgeous Casino actress, says she never goes out on dates. And she is hot as hell, bright, interesting and a talented actress. She said: “I never get asked out. It’s so stupid. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been getting more brazen with flirting, but I don’t think men realize that I’m flirting. They just think, Oh, she’s fun!’”

Singer Madonna arrives at Macy's Herald Square to launch her new fragrance "Truth or Dare By Madonna" on Thursday, April 12, 2012 in New York. (AP Photo/Evan Agostini)

So it appears I’m in good company. I’m not the only one to lament about the lack of dating prospects. Last year, music icon Madonna, also in her 50s, said men her age were simple “undateable.” People who are older, and more set in their ways, are probably not as adventurous as someone younger,” Madonna said. So I guess of Kirstie, Sharon and Madonna share my dating woes I’m pretty much out of luck. I certainly don’t have their talent, looks, connections and not even a fraction of their fortunes. What’s a girl to do? I’ll keep trying and I venture to guess they will too!

Looking Forward 2

iphone-phone-social-media-taxi-car-handbag-stocksy-w352My iPhone pinged. It was an email from my date tonight:

I’ll be waiting for you in the bar on the ground floor. When you get to the front desk, just tell them you’re with me (remember, it’s “X”, just in case you confuse me with your countless other Match dates/admirers/fans 🙂 Look forward to seeing you at 6:00pm! It’s a townhouse right next to the construction at “Y”, which is that new apartment complex. – X

I responded: I’ll write it on my hand so I don’t forget. I promise not to blow your cover. ; ) I’m quite confident I’ll be able to find the address but thanks for your help.

His reply: Love your sense of humour. BTW, cell # is 303-555-1212 in case there’s a problem. You can keep your’s a state secret until we meet and you discover that I’m not a weird stalker.

I wasn’t trying to be funny. I was annoyed. Did he think I would fuck up? Get lost? Tell the (I’m certain) gorgeous hostess that I was on a Match.com date? In a flash, I was nervous and my stomach did flip-flops. I remembered that I never had the preliminary phone call that I do with 99% of my Match.com admirers. I find this is an important step – you can learn a lot in a few minutes i.e.. nervousness, stuttering, boring, neurotics, low energy level (think Jeb Bush!), poor education, and lack of mutual interests among other things. Why didn’t I have the mandatory phone call?! Grr….I went back to read his online profile. I immediately saw a few flags I may have missed the first time because I found him handsome, intelligent, and his note so charming:2014-08-24-Redflag

“Ex-wife and sons live in another country, and ready to get out and enjoy my life again after a few years of emotional hibernation…..The truth is that I’ve always been attracted to self-confident, attractive intelligent women and I’m probably more inclined to go with someone closer to my own age, certainly someone who is closer in age to me than my two sons!. A little further down I saw a few more flags:

louis-vuitton-luggageThere are a lot of exceptional women in this city, as I am beginning to learn. I will say that women over a certain age have the charm and elegance of a great French premier cru wine, and as any wine aficionado can attest, when you’ve sampled a superbly complex older vintage, it’s very hard to go back to younger, less mature stuff.. A Portuguese vinho verde might be temporarily refreshing, but it doesn’t enliven the senses the way a great Cos D’Estournel can do. Even though I’ve made mistakes in previous relationships (we’re all human after all), I remain optimistic that I can eventually get it right with the partner who can help me unpack my considerable baggage :-).  51001e8d78458s58987

Why does his profile say he’s looking for woman 30-54 and he’s 55. Hmm… 30 doesn’t sound like his age group. If his daughters are in their mid 20s that would make 30 much closer in age to them than to him. A slightly snooty/elitist wine snob who’s coming out of “emotional hibernation with considerable baggage”? Ugh. I wondered what this one has packed away in his designer luggage? Could he simply be talking about his divorce? Something worse? Jail time, perhaps? Another felon? Mental breakdown, maybe? Manic Episode? Depressive episode?

I suddenly wasn’t looking forward to my date… but then again, this is precisely what I do before each date I go on: I try to talk myself out of the guy before I even leave my home! I pray I’m wrong this time.

Looking Forward

10This is the first time in a awhile I can remember actually looking forward to a date. Most first dates feel like a chore to me. I’ve been on an awful (and some were truly AWFUL!) lot of dates. I’m often called The Queen fo First Dates by my friends. It’s no longer fun. I often feel like I’m going on a job interview not hoping to find the love of my life.

LEICESTER, UNITED KINGDOM - MARCH 08: Queen Elizabeth II during her visit to Leicester on March 8, 2012 in Leicester, England. The royal visit to Leicester marks the first date of Queen Elizabeth II's Diamond Jubilee tour of the UK between March 8 and July 25, 2012. (Photo by Rui Vieira - WPA Pool/Getty Images)

I’m picky – if you’re a frequent reader you know that by now. I’m also a scaredy cat – you may have figured that out, too. So I have two upcoming dates: one is a fix up the second is a Match.com date.

1953: Belgian-born actor Audrey Hepburn (1929 - 1993) wears a tiara in a headshot still from director William Wyler's film 'Roman Holiday'. (Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images)The Match,com date dude is not American which is a plus for me. I like dating foreign men, they always add something interesting to the conversation and all of the international men I have dated were confident, well-educated and charming. So many American men of a certain age seem to have ED, lack confidence, have a lot of health issues, anxiety and/or depression. Maybe that’s what leads to the ED -the multitude of medications many take can often make matters worse down below.

I’ve been thinking about what I’m going to wear – jeans or cream-colored tailored pants. Should I wear a cozy sweater, a low cut top or a blouse? High heels, flats or boots? Or should I wear a fun dress? Eeeek!

Anyway, I am meeting the first fellow at his gorgeous private club. It’s not a snooty, snobby, fancy pants one that makes you wear a dress, a hat or little white gloves. It’s more of a hipster/artists/creative type international atmosphere from what I’ve heard and read.

My date seems funny and smart and well-traveled, lives in my favorite neighborhood and loves to write. I’m crossing my fingers that he’s a good one. You can bet I’ll let you know if he is!